Inner Demons #1: "Why Do I Suck At This?"

Frustrated with your progress or lack thereof? Embrace the Suck!

spartan+race+embrace+the+suck-.jpg

I want to take a few minutes today and try to shed some light on this obscure 'suck zone' we go through, and perhaps offer some perspective to help you not only power through it, but optimize your progression.

  • "Arrrrgghh!!! Why Can't I Get This!?!?!"

  • "Why is that person getting this so much faster than I am?"

  • "Why do I feel so stupid, or uncoordinated?"

These are common questions I hear, or see, as a coach/mentor/instructor. In order to understand why martial arts, or any new activity requiring physical prowess [other sports apply here] is giving us a hard time, we have to look at the human brain. 

Over the past decade and a half, I have taught highly intelligent people. By and large, most of them extremely intelligent. And yet, when forced to freeze a motion and are asked, many cannot tell you where their arm is located in that moment in time if they do not stop and look at it. I have lost count of the amount of times I have given a correction to someone, and received an incredulous look while stating - "I am leaning, really?!?!?!"

What many of us fail to recognize in ourselves, or cut ourselves slack for, is our level of physical activity going into the arts. So maybe we played sports in high school...then we went to college, got a job, started a family, and then realized at 35 we haven't been active in 17 years and need to so something, anything to do to get moving.

Maybe we are 16 years old and have lived in front of a video game console our whole life; never really using our body. Maybe we are 65 and deciding to take up Tai Chi to stay active, but we spent a bulk of our life parked at a desk job since we were in our 30’s. To our brain, there is a common thread here.

The human brain is incredibly conservative. If something is not being used, then the brain ignores it. Don't exercise? Our muscles atrophy. Don't stand/walk put a load on your skeletal system? Our bones atrophy; after only 18 hours (on a molecular level). It doesn't take long to regress with our physicality, and the brain does the exact same thing.

FRUSTRATED???

FRUSTRATED???

We have pathways connecting neurons in our brain, and each pathway connects one piece of information to another, to another; creating a network, or a web of interconectivity. This happens with physical activity as well. Compare it to our high school Algebra experience. That thing we said we would never use in life. Let’s say we were right, and we never used it after leaving school. Now, when we try to do Algebra at the age of 25, 30, 35, it doesn't work so well. The same thing happens with our body and physical movement.

When we have a group of common connections with shared threads, it is due to our brain building relationships. Connecting one neuron to another neuron to build a 'network'. Think of it as a power grid; transmitting electricity from node to node. If one node goes down, other connections still exist. Except...this power grid automatically shuts down lines that are not being used in order to save energy.

Unfortunately, if we stop using a pathway, the brain starts overwriting these connections it no longer deems relevant. Pathways grow dormant, and new information that is relevant to whatever we are doing in our life HERE and NOW, is what is going to take precedence.

If physical activity is not at the forefront of our life, then atrophy sets in; physical AND mental. The brain does not waste time and energy trying to keep things 'alive' that are not useful to its purpose. If we were a star athlete in college, we will still have pathways for those actions in our prior sport, but they have faded; and continue to fade over time. If we return to the sport in our 30's, we will probably stumble a bit in the beginning, but will likely pick things back up relatively quickly after the initial grind.

The Neural Network

Neural Network

Neural Network

Our brain is full of billions of neurons. When we start training in martial arts, we may develop a neuron for a block, or a punch that we learned. We practiced the block, we know the block, and it is now a reflexive part of us. We practiced punching for hours on end as well.

Now, when someone punches us, we block successfully, but we don't punch, or there is a delay before we punch. Why? No connection...yet. 

After practicing for a while we see similar circumstances. One day we are comfortable enough with our blocking, and punching enough that when someone in class takes a familiar swing at us, we suddenly match up an opening we see in their guard when we are offensively punching, with the opening we see after blocking one of their strikes at us. We then throw a counter punch.

After an action like this, our brain now creates a connection from the ‘punch’ neuron, to the ‘block’ neuron and we become accustomed to seeing that opportunity in the future, and responding that same way the next time. Voilà! Progress.

Now, let's add a piece to the puzzle. Person A punches. We block. We counter punch, but suddenly our punch misses. The person slips the punch. Now we stand there for a second unsure what to do next. Why? We don't have the connection laid yet. This is a new situation that has occurred. We have to build a new path from here. This is like trying to cross from Boston to San Diego in our car, but there is no map. We have to try road after road, retracing steps and getting familiar with paths so we can venture down new paths from there.

Grappling example: We learn how to do an armbar. Neuron is mapped. We learn how to triangle choke from guard. Neuron mapped. Now we are fighting with an opponent in our guard and we go for an armbar. An armbar that we may be quite successful at and have trained thoroughly over and over.

Our opponent pulls the arm before we can secure it. We lose the submission and have to start over with something else. Or instead, we take that triangle choke we practiced a thousand times and we learn how to snap that on as they counter the armbar. We have successfully mapped a connection between these two submissions and our next response is to immediately counter their counter, with another submission. Something that is impossible to do when we have not mapped out either neuron, or built the connection between them. 

The more we train, the more we experience on the mats, failures most importantly, the more neurons we build connections to as we find solutions. Eventually, we get a web of connections and when faced with unfamiliar stimuli, we have a wider net to catch it in, and formulate a ‘creative’ response based on all the other connections in our web. The better we get, the more likely we are to have a 'proper' response to this new threat or action. The more we can ‘see’.

A.I. 

When I was studying Artificial Intelligence, the coolest subject I had in college, and yet somehow turned to the most boring in practicum (still unclear how one can do this), we learned about neural networks. One of the early mistakes made by pathfinders in the field was to try and code every potential outcome into the machine in advance.

While this may work with a simple 3 instruction test, they quickly found it was impossible to train every single scenario/outcome that can happen. Even some of the simplest tasks would take years of coding and massive amounts of storage. Impossible for hardware at the time.

The solution, was to go from ‘trying to program every response possible’, to ‘building neural networks’ - nodes with pathways, interconnected so the computer could train as it goes through a series of pass fails - what is now known as 'machine learning'. Learn through added stimuli, the same way we learn as humans - through trial and error.

Fighting is chaos incarnate. The supercomputer residing inside our skull would take 100's of years to try and calculate all the possible responses in fighting. Instructors training students in this way, would result in absolute disaster. Instead, we train principles. We train using sparring and rolling to create randomness and variability, causing us to error out, and learn a mistake. The results we get are far superior.

This explains why someone becomes more proficient the longer they train. They see more options, form more connections, and become more and more adaptable.

Coaches Perspective

"Your left foot. NOOOO!!! YOUR OTHER LEFT FOOT!!!"

From a coach's perspective, it can be extremely frustrating to tell someone to move their left, or right foot, and have them unaware of where their leg is. I have been in schools where teachers have thrown out students and told them - "Get out!!! This is not for you."; completely giving up on the student due to their lack of coordination.

I wholeheartedly disagree with this approach; even though at times past I confess to watching students and wondering if they were ever going to get it. We never know where someone is going. We all have our own struggles, some earlier in the process than others. Sometimes these same individuals turn out to be the hardest workers because of the struggles they faced early on.

They could become the next coach, mentor, or even a champion; the next in line to pass on the art. If we turn them off of martial arts for good because they didn't get it right away, then the loss of potential is immediate, and sometimes everlasting. Encourage, guide, support.

Patience, understanding, and empathy are easier said than done, but they are necessary tools when teaching our art to ALL those who wish to receive it. Someone with long periods of physical inactivity, is going to take longer to get up to speed with basic movement than a seasoned athlete. We each face our own struggles.

MILITARY TRAINING vs. CIVILIAN

Holly - playing in the mud at Spartan Race 2014

Holly - playing in the mud at Spartan Race 2014

The drill instructors in boot camp have one hell of a job to do - 8 weeks to turn goofy, uncoordinated, immature, head up their a$$ teenagers into lean, mean, fighting machines.

This is not an easy task, and our lives, and the lives of those around us, depend on getting it right. And quickly. However, we are a captive audience; by choice, or not.

When teaching adults/civilians, who are not REQUIRED by some threat to stand there and take our bull$%&^, we have to be somewhat flexible in our demands. We can do this by drawing out the timeline for success. We can't just scream, degrade, and humiliate them until they get it; like boot camp. If we are training people for combat in a condensed period of time, then absolutely.

However, in that case we likely are not teaching in-depth martial arts that require years of training to explore high levels of skill. We would be focused on simplified fighting systems like Xing Yi, Krav Maga, or some other streamlined hand-to-hand combat system. Simplified, and meant for short training not mastering high levels of skill. 

High Skill Competition Training

If we are training competitively, or training a team to compete, then this can also change the game. Pushing people, and people wanting you to push them, become an interwoven dynamic to increase performance, and achieve higher gains.

This process is voluntary on both sides, and usually involves a higher degree of focus and effort on the part of the competitor. Skills increase over time, and people compete at the level/age bracket they are currently at. As they gain higher skill and aptitude, they move up in rank and compete against more advanced opponents.

The Long Term Approach

If we are teaching out of our garage, do not need to sustain ourselves from a vibrant school, or we are trying to train people as quickly as possible, then we can cherry pick our students, and kick out (directly, or indirectly) the one's that won't get up to speed fast enough for our taste, or goals.

But...if we are interested in creating a strong community of martial artists that help one another grow and learn to a high level over time, a group that accepts people of all skill and talent levels among their ranks, then we need to keep in mind that not everyone has been training for these arts their entire life. Some will need more time and patience in the process.

One approach I like to use in thinking about this - drawing. When we want to draw a human face, we don't start by drawing every freckle, line, or hair. We start with a rough circle for the head, and rough circles for the eyes, nose, mouth, ears. Then, we begin to create finer and finer circles and lines. Adding more and more detail as we go, and erasing/removing unnecessary lines. Martial Arts is no different. We don't need to feel like our ROUGH DRAFT is supposed to be the final MASTERPIECE.

All black belts are not created equal. All black belts are not created in the same amount of time.

No SECRETS

There really are no secrets. The solution is simple, but not easily achieved. The longer we train, the more we surround ourselves with other people who train, the more we watch; the more we read, ponder, discuss; the more 'consumption', will directly affect the pace at which we move up the skill ladder.

This obviously takes other traits and behaviors such as discipline to keep showing up, perseverance to get up after each failure and try again, and overall grit to stick through the lows and not just ride the highs. Combine this with continuing to build that neural network, and you have the recipe for success. Eventually creating a web in your brain that is ready to catch anything that flies through it.

Many people come and go from activities. If we keep showing up, keep training, we will keep evolving. Sometimes the successful people we see in various fields, were not the best at what they do, but they are the one's that kept showing up. 

Stay the course. All will be revealed with time and effort.


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Photos courtesy of Max Kotchouro

Bibliography:

Buonomano, Dean. Brain Bugs: How the Brain's Flaws Shape Our Lives. New York: W.W. Norton, 2011. Print.

"The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science Paperback – December 18, 2007." The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science: Norman Doidge: 9780143113102: Amazon.com: Books. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Nov. 2015.

Randy Brown

MISSION - To empower you through real martial arts training. Provide you a welcoming atmosphere to train in a safe manner with good people that you can trust.